Monday, April 28, 2014

Resolve to know more.

Last week was National Infertility Awareness Week 2014. I meant to blog about this earlier but I struggled with what to say. I know I talk about infertility alot and if you are sick of hearing it, just keep reading for future posts and skip this one. But we all know this cause is near and dear to my heart so I'm going to keep talking about it as long as I live. It's important. It's usually a silent struggle and it shouldn't have to be. It shouldn't make people uncomfortable, it should be an opportunity for people to lean on each other and lift each other up in their darkest times. To help others keep hope and find solutions. To resolve to know more about how to help each other and themselves.

Resolve.org is an infertility related website that I didn't know existed until this year and wish I had known about while we were trying to get pregnant. It has some great resources and articles! We won't get into our infertility journey again, it's peppered all over this blog throughout my pregnancy posts if you want to read and catch up on how we got here. I did also share my story by way of an essay through this website. In honor of the 25th anniversary of infertility awareness week RESOLVE is sharing 25 stories of women who have shared their story and tried to help others through infertility by reaching out. This year's blogging theme is RESOLVE to know more!  For example.
  • Resolve to know more about when to see a fertility specialist. 
  • Resolve to know more about all your family building options.   
  • Resolve to know more about infertility advocacy.  
  • Resolve to know more about the latest treatment options. 
  • Resolve to know more about the disease of infertility.  
  • Resolve to know more about adoption.
I have talked alot about what we did through our journey and the treatment options available to women now, along with the disease of infertility itself. And this website offers the same. I love that it encourages education and helping others with infertility as well. It's so empowering to know there are people out there that are public about their journey like I am and want to help others. I still cannot believe the outpouring of support and love and messages we received from our friends and family and coworkers during the process of this blog thanking us for sharing our story with them. It was truly heart warming to hear the feedback! It seems the majority of people know someone who has struggled with infertility or has struggled themselves or is even still struggling and my heart goes out to them. Even after having Henry here it's hard for me to forget the pain and struggle we went through to get him here and of course that makes him even more precious of a gift, but it's still hard. I still look at him and weep in sheer disbelief that he is mine, that I get to keep him, that we beat infertility. We WON! I want other women to know they can win this battle too. For some it may not be a story like ours with a baby of their own. We were very very blessed in that way. But there are options, good ones! It could be a baby with egg or sperm donors, a baby by surrogate, a baby rescued from foster care or an orphanage. Like I have said before, you don't have to physically birth a baby to be a mother. A baby can grow in your heart not just in your belly. I know Henry grew in mine before he was ever conceived. And just as they say it takes a village to raise a child, sometimes it takes one to create one too. We had so many fantastic nurses and doctors on our side helping us but I also had a few near and dear friends to my heart that had walked through this before we did and their information, support, kindness and understanding made our journey so much more bearable. They were just as important to me as the medical team we worked with. Our emotional health was just as drained as my physical health. I want to offer that same support to others. To make myself available to others who are silently struggling and let them know that their questions are more than welcome and my ear is always open to a good breakdown or vent session. It's okay to talk about it, it shouldn't have to be awkward or taboo to talk about. I told my husband long ago that if sharing our story could help one person than it would be more than worth it and we both feel so blessed to be able to use our hardship to help others in any way we know how. Taylor is also open to talking about infertility with the guys too, just a heads up, it's so different from their eyes. He knows how crazy clomid made me, how aweful and guilty I felt, how aweful and guilty he felt, how to best support me, how to best deal with me when I was taking medications and shots and getting several ultrasounds and blood draws each week. He knows how awkward testing for men is and how weird it is to sit in a waiting room full of women. He gets it and so do I. So, we are an open book! I don't know why God gave us the challenges he did trying to have a child and I will never know, but I feel deep in my heart that it was in large part to have us be available to others in need. So we RESOLVE to help others, to educate, to support, to love those who need it most and most importantly to be prayer warriors and hold out hope for those who can't hold onto it themselves. So happy national infertility awareness week, be aware of those around you who might be struggling and be aware of your options if you are too. 

Here are a few great articles from the RESOLVE.org website that I really loved reading and would be great to pass along!
http://www.resolve.org/infertility-overview/what-is-infertility/
http://www.resolve.org/national-infertility-awareness-week/about.html
http://www.resolve.org/infertility-overview/optimizing-fertility/
25 things to say and not say

And last but not least, speaking of infertility. I took Henry to see our Reproductive Endocrinologist (infertility doctor) Dr. Krieg. She asked me to bring our baby in when he was born at our last appointment with her which was back in August. At that appointment we saw Henry as a little blinking gummy bear with a perfect and strong heartbeat and it was then that we were cleared to move from our infertility office to a regular OB office. The nurses were fantastic to us and asked the same and I promised I would. These women work so hard to help create miracles and I'm sure they rarely get to actually see or hold the end result of all of that work. I wanted them to get some baby snuggles and meet Henry and to say thank you for him. I made blue cupcakes for them to celebrate Henry's birthday and brought them a birth announcement to add to their bulletin board in the hall with all the other success story baby announcements. I used to refuse to look at that board as I used to walk by during my appointments. Those should have brought me hope that these people can make miracles and LOTS of them but for some reason it just made me jealous and sad. Now we are part of that board though and it feels good to know we were successful with our battle with infertility. It's like a right of passage or something. A trophy in my mind.
Here are the cupcakes.

And here is Dr. Krieg with him. She was so excited to meet him and he was excited to meet her too despite his grouchy face here (he decided he was hungry). They all passed him around and took him to see all of the other doctors and nurses and sono and lab techs there that we worked with. It was so much fun to get to share him and such a proud momma moment for me! I will be forever grateful for these women and I plan to take them cupcakes each year for Henry's birthday to celebrate him because who doesn't love cupcakes and a thank you. Ugh I'm tearing up now, time to sign off.  But, YAY for success and for Dr. Krieg and for God for creating this miracle baby for us. YAY!

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